Reclaiming Your Sexual Self After Baby
I know I’m doing this backwards but this month we are going to talk about reclaiming your sexual self after baby AND next month we will talk about reclaiming your sexual self while pregnant.
So, which part made you laugh hysterically: reclaiming your sexual self, the very thought of a sexual self after baby or just the concept of sex in general?
I’m here to tell you that sex after baby DOES happen! Really Good Sex! I’ve even heard tell of hardcore monkey-lovin’ happening in houses with babies in them. However, great sex doesn’t JUST happen, there is work involved, especially after a baby has arrived. Fortunately, you just happen to have your very own fairy sex goddess.
The first step is to rediscover your sexual self. If pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding have made you feel like a stranger in your own body it is time to…
Reintroduce yourself. A quick “Hi!” in the shower or a longer “Hello” at bedtime, however that first meeting goes, be gentle. You and your body have changed and, while you still love each other, you are both very different than you were last year. You might need a moment or two for …
A Mental Cleanse. Depending on how old your little one is your cleanse time may vary. You may have the opportunity to have a glass of wine and fully switch gears from mama to sexual being but things might be as simple as changing your clothes. The important thing is not how you do it but that you consciously switch from breastfeeding, sling wearin’, co-sleeping mama to sex goddess. Ask yourself…
What makes you feel sexy? A dab of lip gloss, a cute new 'do? An off-shoulder sweater versus a spit-up stained t-shirt? Yoga, belly-dancing? Can you commit to doing one thing per week that makes you feel sexy? Are you worth it? DAMN RIGHT YOU ARE!!!!! So now, you’re all dressed up but with nowhere to go because…
You’ve changed. The things that turned you on ten months ago may not turn you on now. Hell, you may have forgotten how to get turned on. Whether you read an erotic story or watch a hot movie—figure out what gets your new and improved motor running. Caveat: watch good porn.
Now that you're revved up…
It’s playtime! Vibes and dils are fabulous but what about BODY PAINT! Use your magic paint brush and stake a claim to all your sexy bits. This is a perfect time to draw out your inner artist and create beautiful body art. If you’re not feeling artistically-inclined just write your name or what you would like to do with your body. And, not to get to touchy feely, but how about a message of love and support?
Most mamas feel “touched out” at times and feel that we just can’t give one more thing to one more person—so remember; go slow, be gentle and ENJOY getting re-acquainted with your sexual side.